Starbucks Oracle
Although we don't have Starbucks in Australia (except in Melbourne CBD, maybe?) I tried this out. You tell it what you normally order at Starbucks (so I just told it what I'd get at any other café) and it tells you what sort of a person you are...

Personality type: Asshat

I don't know how that translates to Australish, but I can guess...

You carry around philosophy books you haven't read...

Wrong.

...and wear trendy wire-rimmed glasses...

Wrong again.

...even though you have perfect vision.

Wrong. I'm long-sighted

You've probably added an accent to your name or changed the pronunciation to seem sophisticated.

I've cut the 'her' off the end, so I guess that's right.

You hang out in coffee shops...

I go to a café about once a month.

...because you don't have a job...

Yes I do.

...because you got your degree in French Poetry.

What degree?

People who drink normal sized cappuccinos are notorious for spouting off angry, liberal opinions about issues they don't understand.

That's right.

Also drinks: Any drink with a foreign name

Yep.

Can also be found at: The other, locally owned coffee shop you claim to like better

As I mentioned earlier I don't go to cafés very often, but I probably would rather go to an independent café than Starbucks, if I'd ever been to or even seen a Starbucks.